Friday, June 12, 2015

When One Domino Falls

One domino fell out of line today and it's been feeling like much more of a catastrophe than it is.  I know what horrible days are, and this is not it, but I still feel pretty panicked.  I thought I had my dominoes all lined up neatly and as they wavered out of line, there was still time to set them back in line and keep moving forward.  Well, the time for arranging dominoes is quickly coming to an end.  I can see the sand flowing through the hourglass and time is almost up.

So, I was devastated when I was told today that there is no way the bathroom can be done before surgery.  It cannot even go back before committee until that date.  So, although I am thankful for Plan B options, I don't like to think about them.  How am I supposed to relax before surgery knowing this is not settled?  How am I supposed to recover when contractors are working on my bathroom after surgery?  How I am supposed to mange bathroom needs during recovery when my master bath is unusable?  

I'm panicking.  What if we wait so long the contractors can no longer wait on me and can't get to the job for weeks or months?  What if in my panicked state I've done something to make this an even longer process?  

What if one domino falling out of line is only a precursor of what is to come?  What if I'm looking forward to a multitude of disappointments?

This has been a "what if" day and I know I shouldn't do that.  Now that all of you have gotten to experience "what ifs" with me, I will turn my focus to "what is" and figure out what's next.  One domino falling out of line is not the end of the world.  It is just a turn in a different direction and requires more thought about "what's next."

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